11.9.00
Doin' it Doggie Style at the White House
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Puppy Politicos
From Socks to Monica, the White House has had its share of cuddly pets. The question is, which canine candidate will be fouling the oval office rug for the next four years now that Clinton is departing?

Brand Opening
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Cool Brand-tannia
Don't you love crackin' open an ice-cold can of Blisco and feeling that burning effervescence trickling down your throat? No? Oh, you must be a Koloko drinker. Actually, come to think of it, you strike me as a Gay-Ola fan.... If you've never heard of these sodie-pop brands, you're not alone. Believe it or not, as featured in The Guardian Unlimited's 11/1 coverage, back in 1917, these were among more than 300 cola brands crowding the now shaken-out supermarket shelves.

Why do certain brands achieve iconic status, while others fade into oblivion? Better yet, what the heck is "brand" anyway? These are questions that have plagued the marketing world for what seems like forever. As featured in The Guardian piece, a recent exhibit at London's Victoria & Albert Museum entitled "Brand.New" explores branding and its effects on culture, society and the individual. According to the story, "Brand.New provides a solid grounding in the meaning, function and omnipresence of logos...."

One installation is described as a "field of signs" waving about like stalks of corn, displaying such ubiquitous British visages as those of Tony Blair and the Queen Mother, alongside Boddingtons and Tesco logos. "Another room explains how brands highlight various "values": Authority, Authenticity, Status, Irreverence, Friendly (sic)..."

Nike...Nike...Nike...the repeated name floods the screen on the V & A Museum's Brand.New micro-site, burying a branded young man in so much "Just Do It" slogan slime. Teenage boys draped in floppy duds stare vacantly, and up pops the phrase "Goods can be means of differentiating oneself in order to belong" in all its ironic glory. A couple of clicks to the right sits a baby, wrapped in swaddling brands like Pampers, Mothercare and Johnson & Johnson. The li'l munchkin is accompanied by an idea that is familiar to all brand marketers: "Wrapped up in the logo, the product, the ad and the name lies a promise of emotional satisfaction -- branded goods are saturated with this meaning."

Provocatively, The Guardian article refers to dot-com branding as "the most nebulous enterprise of all, in which millions are spent establishing loyalty for what often seem to be free-floating brands with no tangible product attached."

Isn't it intriguing that a newspaper writer would make such a generalization about the nature of branding intangibles? I mean, surely Guardian readers don't choose the paper on account of its tooth or the quality of ink used. Plus, the article is available online! Perhaps most Internet branders would agree that although website offerings are sometimes impalpable (barring the goods sold by ecommerce retailers), the essence of brand transcends media.

Ministry of Detached Ads
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Marketing Misery and Mass Murder
They've created campaigns for products like rice and bras, so surely British agency Delaney Lund Knox Warren had the right stuff to develop ads for something a tad more serious. That's why the Imperial War Museum hired the startup to develop ads for its permanent Holocaust exhibit. Hey, how difficult could it possibly be to promote something as light-hearted as an exhibit devoted to the killing of six million Jews?

Well, perhaps the agency could have used a refreshment course in sensitivity. As reported in an 11/2 Wall Street Journal article (Agency's Use of 'British' Irony To Show Horror Draws Protests, by Sarah Ellison), the result was ad copy like, "Come and see what man can achieve when he really puts his mind to it," and "Once in a while, someone invents a product that changes people's lives."

However off-putting, the poster ads definitely attract attention; the museum boasts a turnout of 100,000 people in only four months since the exhibit's opening. According to the story, "the Imperial War Museum sank some $25 million into creating its Holocaust exhibit…and hired Delaney Lund to make sure it was a success." Hmmm...one wonders if referring to Third Reich propaganda campaigns would have proved even more fruitful for the clever agency.

Carl Nichols, chief executive of Einson Freeman, a U.S. marketing unit of WPP Group PLC, opines, "It is the dispassionate quality of the exhibit and the ads that makes the whole thing so British." Still, could neglecting the delicacy of the subject matter for the sake of the audience's apparent frigidity be defeating? Perhaps not: the museum has only received about 20 complaints according to the Journal piece.

It is inevitable, though, that the ads will continue to incite strong reactions. Consider the fact that works by Hitler's favorite composer, Richard Wagner, were banned from the airwaves and concert halls of Israel until the end of October. And even if most Brits aren't bothered by this debatably trite treatment of genocide, the existence of the campaign begs a more encompassing question. Although it is important to teach people about and remember this horrific occurrence, is it kosher (pardon the pun) for the agency or the museum to profit from it?

Rocky Mountain Ruckus
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Broncos Fans Bust Sponsorship Bids
Although a William Saffire consultation would make it official, it can be deduced that the word "fan" stems from the word "fanatic." Those familiar with the mentality of enthusiasts, be they comic aficionados, music mavens or eager etymologists, realize that this "fanatic" derivation is quite appropriate. These days, taxpayers in Denver are even more than aware of this fact.

You see, for a while now, a few firms have considered slapping their corporate labels on the new home of the Broncos football team, and they'd gladly compensate Colorado's coffers for the privilege. According to an 11/2 RockyMountainNews.com story, the state's Governor Bill Owens claims that stadium naming rights could tally $150 million over 20 years. Owens seems a tad miffed at Denver's Mayor Wellington Webb, too. As noted in another 11/2 RockyMountainNews.com article, it appears that Mr. Mayor is pushing to maintain the Mile High tag, even though a corporate sponsorship could re-appropriate sales taxes paid by Denver-area residents that are being used to pay for the half-built, $400 million stadium. As a result of the Mayor's questionable campaign, negotiations with branding bidders have been suspended, while some bidders, including AT&T Broadband and Invesco Funds Group Inc., have dropped out altogether.

I'll admit: custom and sentimentality are beautiful things. And surely, most true fans of anything would rather see the object of their appreciation die prematurely than change, especially when that alteration involves the cheapening of tradition in exchange for corporate funds. As we all know, sports lovers, particularly football nuts, completely eschew commercialization in any form. Take the Super Bowl for instance; I mean, if that event doesn't represent unadulterated, ad-free purity, I don't know what does!

Quoted in a 10/29 editorial, Mayor Webb inquired rhetorically, "Wouldn't it be nice...to say that everything is not for sale?" Hmmm...I wonder whether Mayor Webb isn't mile high on the rocky mountain reefer. I mean, that's an odd thought, coming from a constituent-pacifying politician in regards to a $400 million stadium that will undoubtedly draw mountainous sums of money from exorbitantly priced tickets, tasteless food and team-logo-laden trinkets.

BlueMountain Ego
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Have School Bus, Will Squander
Can the over-the-top marketing tactics of Internet-related outfits be applied to promote political goals? Well, as VC firm Draper Fisher Jurveston's Tim Draper's church/state wall-busting voucher support and Real Networks' exec Maria Cantwell's Washington state run for Senate illustrate, dot-com dineros truly have become a factor in legislative propositions and political campaigns. So, what's to stop the genius who turned a free e-card site into a multi-million dollar buyout deal?

Well, budget constrictions certainly haven't hampered 25-year-old Jared Polis' efforts. Evidently, the bluemountainarts.com entrepreneur has been a bit bored since he sold his site to ExciteAtHome for unfathomably big bucks. So, he caught the political campaign bug and decided to run for Denver's Board of Education.

It wasn't your daddy's Board of Ed campaign, though. This was your "how soon we forget the days when the 'rents peddled greeting cards door-to-door for a living kinda campaign." In fact, as featured in the 10/30 Salon.com story, Polis coupled over $340,000 of his own funds with more than $343,000 in campaign financing donations to total "more than all money raised by the 42 candidates who have run for the board since 1988." Oh yes -- we're talkin' "chocolates and pencils that bear his name," TV ads and even a wired school bus. Knowing the Web world's love for PR spin, however, something tells me that the "straight talk express" label didn't apply to Polis' big, yellow ego-on-wheels.

What's his response to critics of his indulgent campaign? Well, as noted in the Salon piece, the democrat and proponent of bilingual education and charter schools "says the money is a means to the end, providing a way to inform voters about his views and get them interested."

Considering the fact that when this story was filed, Polis "was narrowly trailing in his race with Republican incumbent Ben Alexander" who spent "just over $7,800" on his campaign, according to an 11/8 RockyMountainNews.com report, perhaps Polis' employment of Machiavelli's princely theory is flawed.

Hey, isn't it comforting to know that Polis' profits were put to such good use? This kid's really got his priorities straight. C'mon now -- why would he want to donate that cash for piddly things like classroom computers, new textbooks, or educational programs when he could blow it on valuable T-shirts and water bottles?